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Sunday, September 13, 2009

Where have I been???

Three Months...
Since I started this blog I have never gone so long without posting. I guess it is just so hard to come here day after day with virtually no news. I think I will just post a quick "things I liked" and "things that need to improve" post like I have my students do after they watch a performance...

Things I liked
Hiring a great new teacher that I really like.
A surprise redo of our back patio by my sweet husband.
Reconciling with my BFF
Vacationing in Kansas City and meeting my blog pal Jess.
Visiting my dear friend Kim in Branson and meeting her awesome family.
Mr. D and I taking Truman on vacation with us for 29 days!
Eating a lot of ice cream and cupcakes.
Our friend Chris and Lisa meeting us in Florida for 4 days on the beach.
Renewing our wedding vows on the beach in a beautiful service 7/23/09.
Surprising my mom with a visit.
Learning that "Manhattans" are my new signature drink.
Taking 20 kids to theatre camp.
keeping connected on facebook.
Starting to practice yoga.
Implementing a yoga class after school once a week for theatre kids and faculty
Starting off the school year slowly.

Things that need to improve
Spending the entire month of June stressing about my job.
Facing the adoption delays.
$800 vet bills for the cat while we are hundreds of miles away on vacation.
Having my theatre staff cut at school by 25%.
Missing my daughter Finley so bad... when I have never even met her.
Spending the entire summer tied to the pump at least 4 times a day... everyday.
Sore boobs.
Really feeling old, fat, and not that cute...
More friends coming up accidentally pregnant.
Fighting major bouts of anxiety.
Coming back to school to old issues not resolved over the summer.
Everyone at school asking "Hey!!! Where's your baby???"
The unexpected passing of Mr. D's father.
Feeling behind at school because I have just not been very motivated at my job... "baby fever"?


I am trying very hard to be patient. To live through every moment... but it is getting so hard. I never thought that our adoption would still be going on in September of 2009... Truth be told I expected to have a baby last April (at the latest)... but that is just not how things are going.

I still have faith... I know God is bringing our daughter to us... but this wait is agonizing.

My favorite yoga teacher told us the other day that in yoga strength and patience are closely related. The yoga definition of strength is "the ability to keep your balance when facing adversity" and the definition of patience is "the ability to keep your balance when facing the unknown".

Please pray for both patience and strength for my little family... all three of us.

9 Comments:

Blogger Army Wife Extraordinaire *~A.W.E.*~ said...

I have wondered where you were...it's good to see you post. I'm sorry you don't have Finley yet. Soon, oh soo soon I hope

6:36 PM  
Blogger polyhex said...

I was just thinking of you today and visited your blog before you posted this update. I've been lurking for years: there are many people eagerly looking forward to your happy ending! Hang in there.

6:53 PM  
Blogger SassyCupcakes said...

*hug* I've been thinking about you. Your 'Things I liked' list is awesome. :)

I'm so sorry to hear about Mr D's father passing away.

You're doing so well with the pumping. I'm not sure I'm going to be able to do it like that. *fingers crossed* Finley finds her way to you soon.

9:02 PM  
Blogger Piccinigirl said...

I'm so glad to read this, not so happy that Finley isn't here yet, but I am praying for you ...a lot!!!! She's on her way and you'll have peace and patience and parenthood. :)

I'm sorry about all the things that didn't go well and Mr D's dad passing. *hug* but am glad that you got to do all the things you liked...how romantic and exciting and wonderful.

I'm on facebook..so try to find me or email me and we can catch up there.

thinking of you & hoping you know I'm holding your hope in my heart.Your baby will be here soon.

7:24 AM  
Blogger juneheller said...

Thanks for posting something. I know the wait must be so hard. We are all praying your daughter comes quickly. I imagine all that pumping is generating some serious Mommy hormones and making you miss Finley even more. She'll be here soon!

6:16 AM  
Blogger Heather W. said...

Finally! I am so happy you updated! Not happy that Finley is not here with you yet...but each day is another day closer and she is so worth the wait!

Sounds like an eventful summer! Sorry about your father in law...those are tough times.

5:25 AM  
Blogger Momzilla said...

I'm also glad to see your post. I hope things start swinging up for you soon. I lost my father very suddenly just over a year ago...The emptiness it leaves is unlike any pain or sadness I have ever know. Mr D and You are truly in my thoughts.

When Your Girl finally joins you in your home, it will be worth the wait! I'm sure that does not really help you right now, but it's true. Until then, try to keep yourself busy, distracted and healthy. Good news will be coming soon!

8:16 AM  
Blogger Angi said...

glad that you are back. we're all waiting for finley, and share your anxiety, and send you hope and good karma.

7:40 PM  
Blogger Jeanna said...

Thank you for checking in!

I wish that I could give you the name of my fertility doctor but I'm sure you've gotten millions and millions of names....and I understand the pain & frustration.

Huggs...big huggs!

5:56 PM  

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