Things that wake me up in the middle of the night...
Stupid Things I Worry About...
Besides the obvious possible complications and stress in the adoption process, here are the pointless things I am losing sleep over...
1. Not having "things" ready for baby Finn... I have a car seat and lots of clothes... enough diapers for several days... but I am waking up in the middle of the night over things I don't have... an ear thermometer... enough wipes... a crib mattress pad... baby gas drops... and a million other things that are causing me heart palpitations....
2. My unfinished knitted baby blanket... I probably just need to "let it go" or flipping get crackin' on this one!
3. My sub plans for the 6 weeks of maternity leave. I am very stressed about "leaving" my students... I know that this is just a "let go" type of thing... but it is so hard. I loooove my co-teacher and I don't want her to have to do any extra work to make up for my absence. I am planning to go up to school to check in couple of times a week... but I just don't want to leave anyone in the lurch.
4. My obsession with choosing the right diaper. We are planning to use g-diapers and then we are at least going to try cloth inserts with the g-diapers when we are at home. And that means a whole new vocabulary... gflappers, prefolds, hemp/fleece doublers, gcloths... so many things... so much to figure out. In case anyone know what I am talking about... I think I am leaning toward the gflappers...
5. The MAJOR competition my students go to on March 24th... this is the biggest competition of the year and we have to be prepared for me not to be there! In fact... Jenn (our lovely birthmom who has given me permission to give her a name) thinks that she is going to deliver early... in fact she predicts that very week!!! So this is another time I am going to have to rely on my super woman co-teacher to get them to the contest and know that she will be able to handle it all! Can you tell I am a control freak??? especially about my job...
6. Not having the car seat installed in the car... by the firechief so we know it is perfectly safe.
7. Not having our bags packed so that we can run in the house grab the bags and head to Lubbock! I really thought about packing my bag this weekend... And then I thought maybe I had lost my mind...
As I list these things they do seem silly and nothing to have panic attacks about... I know that everything is going to work out fine and that everything will get done... and I am working hard to make sure that I do everything I can to have everything organized and ready when I have to leave work. And realistically Mr. D. and I know none of these things matter.. the ONLY thing that matters is getting that little one home and getting to be her Mommy and Daddy!!!
Jenn and I correspond every few days and we talked on the phone for 90 minutes the other night... she is truly a blessing in our lives and we can't wait to share our lives with her. We could not have asked for a birthmother more perfectly matched for us.
I have found some baby products that I am super interested in... check them out and let me know what you think I "need"! I don't have any of these goodies yet... but they are on my dream baby gift list... do you have products that you can't live without??? Let me know about them.
Soft Spot Mat
Nap Nanny
Gdiapers
Gflappers
Baby K'tan Sling
Bum Genius Diaper Sprayer
Please keep us all in your prayers over the next 6 weeks (WHAT 6 WEEKS????) And also please pray that I get some sleep while I still can!!!
posted by Mrs. D. @ 3/01/2010 05:57:00 PM
21 Comments:
I think that this is completely normal and understandable! In my opinion, do #6 & #7, talk to your co-teacher about your concerns and let the others go. I used cloth diapers, starting when my daughter was 2 months old and a lot of it was trial and error to see which worked the best for us. I'd suggest that you get a variety and then see what you like. You can still get things after the baby comes! (I sort of didn't realize that until after mine came.) If you have not already done so, it might be a good idea to check out your local La Leche League group, a lot of times the members are a great source of info on cloth diapers, carriers and even a place to find playdates. :) I'm fairly certain that they'd welcome you to meetings before the baby comes.
As for your list, I thought about getting the diaper sprayer but I didn't and never missed it. I already mentioned this on a comment awhile ago, but I strongly suggest that you get a gadget to make sure that the bath temp is not too hot/cool. Mine is shaped like a duck.
Sending you good thoughts!
You don't sound crazy...you sound like a Mom. Get used to it...I hear the worrying lasts for 40 or 50 years or so. :)
Thanks Michelle! I did get a bath temp thingy! Mine is shaped like a turtle!
I say go crazy. You're going to be a Mum. It's crazy, it's wonderful, be crazy, be wonderful. You're going to be a Mum!!
I love my BumGenius sprayer... great for rinsing the really dirty diapers. (We use BumGenius One Size 3.0.) Try to find one used though because they are quite expensive!
I made my own ring sling - super easy - and I used it a lot.
I'm super excited for you!
So much to think about but don't worry, it will all come together :)
We have hardwood floors and I would have loved that spot pad! Instead, I just layered enough blankets to make it soft. The nap nanny seems like a great idea (my daughter had colic), but maybe see what kind of sleeper Finley is? You can always pick it up later . . . And re: a sling: is there a sling "library" in your town where you can try different styles out? Every baby is different and it sucks to spend the $ on something your baby hates. I have a New Native sling and I used it with my infant and again recently when I traveled alone with her (18 months) to carry her on my hip. My SIL swears by the Moby. I can't wait for your big announcement!
As the time gets close for baby to arrive, all new moms have this anxiety. But remember, there are stores, you can always send the hubby or grandma out to buy things if you find you need them. Pretty much all you need to start is the things you already have- car seat, diapers, etc. Each baby is different, so try not to buy too much of any one thing or get too set on something because your Finly might surprise you. :)
I used the new native carrier for the first few weeks then we switched to the moby. Once my son was about 9 months, we moved to the ergo baby carrier, and I can still use the ergo (son is 2 years old/35 pounds).
Simple Mom did a nice post on what you need for a newborn. They're a great site with a lot of cool resources. http://simplemom.net/
I'm really excited for you : )
I was actually just thinking what I would do/want if I started all over again. I think the play mat looks awesome, and if I had known about it would have totally wanted it. I agree with the comment about waiting to see what type of sleeper she is before investing in the nap nanny. And if you are curious about cloth diapering, you may want to go to http://www.jilliansdrawers.com/ to order her sampler. You pay about $150 up front for a sample pack of different types of cloth diapers, and can use them for 21 days after the birth day. Then you can return what you don't want. If you don't want any of them (even after you've used them) then you get all of your money back minus $10. So for $10 you can try lots of different types! Personally, I have 40 prefolds and covers, and only do laundry once a week. I use disposables at night because I only need one per night, so one pack for 2 months is my little luxury. We did use disposables the first 2 weeks since we had them from our shower and it helped us ease into newborn care. But now it seems weird to use disposables during the day! (My mom does daycare and she's fine with cloth.) And we have the diaper sprayer. Hubby is a bit squemish, so the sprayer is nice (but it does leak a little.) And for the sling, I liked my pouch for a newborn, but LOVE my Ergo now that he is heavier. It really saves my back!
We planned and planned and shopped and read lists etc in preparation for Danny, but the first few weeks we STILL ran to the store every day for some essential item we forgot. But that was kinda the fun part. Our top 3 first week needs: nightlights, swaddlemes, and newborn clothes because the 0-3 stuff was just too big on our 8.5lb baby.
Good luck!
I want that play mat..for me!!! I am not much help since we still use HUGGIES diapers with the cloth questions, but I did love the nap nanny and the mat..both very cute and very functional.
In thinking back, the things I couldn't live without were cloth diapers because I used them as burp clothes and now I use them for Buggers.I know I know..but they really are great when the boys have a cold etc. I also LOVE my ear thermometer , I didn't think much of it at first, but it is STILL my favorite thing 2 yrs later. :)
Aquaphor...Aveeno Lavendar Baby Lotion and Baby Magic Hair and Body Wash. Three things we stock up on. :)
I'm so happy for you, you sound like a mom. You don't know how happy it makes me to say that to you.
:)
I love the moby wrap and the ergo for when they are a little older. With the moby, in the first few months, you can swaddle the baby so close to you, and go do anything you need, including shopping, without the baby being exposed to anything.
# 1, you are not crazy, AT ALL. It doesn't matter if you are a maternal mommy or a heart mommy, the worries are the same and they come from the same place -the desire to have everything go well and bring home a healthy, happy baby. Don't worry about worrying, It's natural.
#2, I don't know much about the products you have listed but here are the items I absolutley could NOT have lived without.
` angel care monitor (I still use this and he is almost a year). It sounds an alarm if it does not detect movement for 20 seconds, thus alleviating my concerns about SIDS and, of course, has the regular monitor too
` Boudreaux But Paste -I use this at very diaper change and he has never had diaper rash
` Cleanwater Infant Bath Tub with Digital Thermometer. He never sits in dirty bath water and I never have to worry about the water being the right temp.
` Boppy Chair, I love it. He started using it around 2 months and it really gave me an "extra" hand when I needed one.
I'm sure there are more but that is all I can think of off the top of my head.
Can't wait for another update!
The nap nanny ROCKS
Please don't trust a fire chief with making sure your Finn is buckled in right. Go to: http://www.seatcheck.org/ and find a certified car seat tech to install it for you!
(Not that I have anything wrong with fire chiefs, but they don't have to have any sort of training, unlike a CPST.)
Products:
- good carrier. Opinions vary. Love the ergo, but heard that it's best from six months (I think a lot of things are a bit awkward at newborn stage - we only got ours later anyway)
- bouncer/swing/hammock, preferably one that vibrates or swings or does something on its own
- cloth nappies - not sure of the ones you're talking about. I have given all mine up except fitted varieties. The others were unreliable unless they fit perfectly and bub kept growing and changing shape! Fitted nappies with covers have never let me down. (I prefer tots bots flexitots.)
- lots and lots and lots of burp/spill/wipe cloths.
To be honest, there is very little you actually, need, and the shops will still be open after the baby arrives ;) - which is when we bought most of our really useful stuff, because it's a bit trial and error and what works with your lifestyle.
Bea
I loved My Brest Friend. It's a nursing pillow and I couldn't have lived without it. I could never get the Boppy to work for that purpose but with the MBF I could get the baby in a great position every time. Congratulations to you, by the way!
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!! I am sooooo happy for you!! Sorry I have been MIA. It is such a blessing coming here and finding this out!! You are going to be the best Mom! Wow, I am at a loss for words right now, how exciting! Congrats! My prayers are definitely with you during the next few months. You deserve this!
Sounds like you are already well prepared. I agree with Bea in particular, the shops will be open after the baby arrives, so so long as you have the carseat, some nappies, some muslins (never understand why you americans don't have them, I think the equivalent is burp cloths but burp cloths are not nearly as absorbent), a few baby gros (onesies?), and somewhere to put the baby down - a moses basket, bouncy chair, co-sleeper etc., then you are set for now.
By the way, is there any way you can possibly take longer than 6 weeks off? It will be so very hard to leave her at 6 weeks and she will barely be smiling yet, let alone be the fun baby you can really enjoy spending time with later. Plus she'll still be up multiple times in the night. Six weeks is about when I felt at my worst as the adrenaline had worn off and the night feeding was unrelenting. Any way at all to stretch this even if you take unpaid leave through til your summer break, which would give you til september when she'll be 6 months and it will all be a bit more manageable?
I liked gdiapers except for one thing--the velcro strips wear out and have a harder time holding closed. I loved Whisper Wraps with cloth inserts and had several. They aren't as super cute, but they were more "long-lasting". BumGenius are cute and reliable too.
BumGenius sprayer is AWWWWWESOOOOME. Way better than hosing off diapers in the backyard.
Lauren lived on a Boppy for so long. We still have it and she uses it as a TV-watching/book-reading pillow now.
Gotta 2nd the Boudreaux Butt Paste.
Gas drops saved our sanity. Also, since you are going to be bf'ing, Lauren would react adversely (tummy gas/lots of crying) if I ate chocolate or broccoli. I avoided those and it helped.
If I think of any more advice, I will come back. But you're going to do GREAT. Seriously. All new moms worry about every detail, every single possible detail they could miss or not get in time. It always works out beautifully though. I can't wait to hear about her arrival!
I strongly recommend an ergo baby carrier with the infant insert. I find mine extremely comfortable and with the insert you can use them from birth (my son outgrew the insert around 4-5 months, but it was only $25.)
Re: taking time off, 6-8 weeks is the statistical peak for newborn crying, you may actually be happy to go back to work and get an adult break. :D I went back to work at 8 weeks and I was very happy with the timing, it would have been SO much harder at 12 weeks when most babies are delightful.
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