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Wednesday, May 28, 2008

Small town visit...

I thought that the second I got back from "small town five hours away" I would blog the whole experience. I thought that I would be bursting with news and excitement... and I was... I just have been spending the last week processing everything and I felt a little selfish with the experience and wanted to just share it with my husband for a few days first... it was that wonderful.

The five hour drive was easy. We listened to a Steve Martin autobiography on the way and it made the time fly by. I knew that we would be in a time crunch to get there so I thought I was being very smart by washing my hair in the morning, not curling it, and bringing my car adapter to use my hot rollers on the way so my curls would be fresh and bouncy. I rode in the car in my sweats and picked out a fresh little black and white capri set to wear at the interview. We were already running a little late... I told M that we would arrive between 2-3 pm and we were booking it to get there by 3:15... so.... I plugged in my rollers and what???? The adapter wouldn't work! Plugged in my cell phone... boom... adapted worked... rollers again.. nothing. I started to panic and my sweet husband looked over and said... "I think your hair looks great straight"... I I just let it go. I did my makeup and changed my clothes in the car and we pulled into town at about 3:20.

We borrowed a GPS system from a friend to try out and it worked great.. until we got into town. "You've arrived!" she said right in from of the most dilapidated scary old building I have ever seen. I started to panic! I had visions of some fake adoption agency where they took your money and you never saw then again. We were just about to pull in and see what was up when we realized the address was off by 2 blocks... whew.

We pulled in to a much cuter building! My agency is so small that it also triples as the family law practice and real estate office! As we walked up I said I was scared and asked Mr. D. if he was scared too.. he said "there isn't anything to be afraid of... we are just meeting them!" My husband is wise. We opened the door and a little dog that (No kidding) looked EXACTLY like our beloved little Truman ran up and started jumping into our arms. I looked at Mr. D. and we both smiled and took it as a good sign. We met M. and her mother who also works in the office and a few others... we toured the office and then met in a small boardroom. Everything was so comfortable and homey. They were transferring records onto a new server so there were boxes around.. but it just added to the casualness and actually helped put us at ease.

Snuffy the sweet puppy sat in Mr. D's lap for the whole meeting! M. told Mr. D. all the stuff about the agency that she and I had talked about on the phone. She took so much time with us and told us many adoption stories and warned us of the "crazy out of control" feelings that we (especially me) will feel at some point of the process. She said "don't ever spend time worrying about thing like "I really want to call M. and ask where we are but I don't want to be pushy" she said... "Just call!" She promised to talk us (me) down and help us (me) get through the wait. She said "somehow.. I swear.. I think the adoptive mom develops the pregnancy hormones... and we all... just... get a little crazy.. it is part of it!". She adopted her daughter from Russian 3 years ago and shared with us that she is beginning the process again to adopt another little girl. She also said something else that I thought was very wise "When you finally start the adoption process... It starts to feel that your baby is out there somewhere and you can have panic about wanting to find them... it is such an out of control feeling and it is my mission to help you get through that until God brings us your baby."

She asked us what we really wanted... beyond a "healthy baby"... did we have any specifics? I looked over at our bright pink homestudy binder and said... "we really want a girl... is that ok?... can we just ask for a Hispanic or Caucasian or biracial baby girl?... Is that ok?" And she said "We can do that. You want a daughter. I totally understand." Just about then her gorgeous four year old little girl E. walks in a climbs into her arms. "She just woke up from her nap" she said "we are very casual here... we brng our kids and pets with us to work!" It was like magic! We spent the next 30 minutes talking and laughing with E. while she had a mid afternoon snack. She told us about her puppy (still in Mr. D.'s lap) and about her little sister they were getting. She told us that she was born in Russia and that she wanted to be a mermaid when she grew up. It was charming and perfect and wonderful.

After and hour and a half we left with hugs all around. On the way out we looked down and saw a tiny hand print in the cement in front of the agency... snapped a picture because it just felt like another sign. We talked about names and drove quietly on the way home. We both just felt so amazed at how perfect everything went.

It was a very good trip... and I have made the trip another hundred times in my mind since then... So forgive me for being a little selfish with the story... I just needed to keep it in my heart for a while and process it all before I shared. It just seems so real now...

...we are actually going to have a daughter.

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Wednesday, May 21, 2008

paperwork... check.

Paperwork is done!!! (OK.. almost done... I still have to proof a few things and photocopy everything for our records... but we are soooo close to done paperwork I can taste it!)

Mr. D. and I went to the beautiful Japanese Gardens in town and worked on the last few questions on Saturday... we are fingerprinted... all of the financial stuff is gathered... we have put together a few photos for the agency... and we have the most organized color coded and tabbed binder in the world.

We will be taking a road trip on Friday to "small town 5 hours away" to meet the people at the agency that will be handling our adoption... did you see that I just typed "our adoption" like it might actually be happening. So.. there should be pictures and stories coming from our trip.

There are 5 days of school left.. actually four since I am taking off on Friday... then we will leave town for two weeks on vacation on the 30th (only 9 days away!) We are going to North Carolina to visit my mom... Savannah, Georgia for a couple of days in a fun new city... then to our yearly beach condo trip for a week of pure bliss in the sand! When we come back I hope they will be ready to do the home portion of our homestudy... then I will teach (2) two week theatre camps and spend the rest of the summer resting... gym-ing... and trying to be patient.

The other small news is that Mr. D. and I bought something for the room that will someday be called the nursery but is now called the "sitting room". We found a small wardrobe and record cabinet on Craig*s L!st for only $60. Imagine them totally refinished.. probably white shabby chic style. The wardrobe will be for clothes since there is no closet in the room we don't call a nursery and the record cabinet will be a perfect changing table / toy box once we change to safety hinges and refinish. It will be a nice summer project for Mr. D. and I when we are trying not to spend money on the long summer days off.

Things are getting exciting... Am I moving to fast? Sometimes I get so nervous that this isn't real. But it feels so great to have a plan... so right now... while I am feeling hopeful... we are starting to plan like there might actually be a baby in that room we don't call a nursery.

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Wednesday, May 14, 2008

busy... busy... busy... my fingers hurt from typing.

I can't believe it has been two weeks since I have posted...

I feel like I haven't stopped typing about myself and our lives in the past two weeks! We are almost finished with all of our homestudy documents. The questionnaire is now 34 pages and we still have about 6 questions to finish. Then I need to revise and check it all like an English teachers since most of it has been answered very "stream of consciousness". We are still waiting for a little bit of paperwork to come in the mail... previous marriage licences, Mr. D.'s college transcripts... etc... and we still need to do to the city jail to be fingerprinted. Then, we will take a 5 hour road trip to far of small town to drop off this tick binder of info. Then... we wait for the actual homestudy visit.

In the past two weeks we have told our families and many of our friends what our plans are. They have all been very supportive and are very excited for us. I have spent hours in my traditional OCD type A personality googling baby furniture and cloth diapers... but there is no way I have the guts to actually purchase anything... I guess that is what infertility does to you. Mr. D. and I also ventured into the mysterious Babies!RUs to see what all the fuss is about... and honestly I almost had an anxiety attack. I was totally overwhelmed. So I think I will wait until we are a little closer to an actual child before I make actual purchases.

There are 12 days of school left and then Mr. D. and I will get out of town around June 4h for our annual vacation. We are going to visit my mom in North Carolina and then back to the beach condo for a restful week. I start teaching again on June 19th... I am directing a theatre camp for 10 days and then teaching technical theatre a a different camp until July 10th... so the first half of my summer will be very busy.. which is why we wanted to get all this paperwork stuff done before school is out.

OK... That is my update for now. I am off to work a 14 hour day at school for the next two days because we have our final performances of the year the next two nights!

I hope everyone is doing well and has a great week.

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